November 10, 2011

Elf on the Shelf

Some parents have moral dilemmas about lying to their children about Santa Claus, Tooth Fairy, or the Easter Bunny. Even though I don't have kids of my own, I can already tell you that I will not be one of those parents. I love the holidays and want my children to embrace all the magic that comes with them.

OK... and I'm not going to lie, Santa is a fantastic behavior monitor. I'm all about anything that motivates children to act like little angels so they can be handsomely rewarded on December 25. It's bribery on steroids, but you know what? It works!

For any parent that has not yet been introduced to the magic that is The Elf on the Shelf, you need to request one from the North Pole immediately! He's basically Santa's gift to parents around the world who need to start threatening consequences to bad behavior before the holidays (or July, if you live in my home... because I like well-behaved children all year long).

Clearly, keeping a watchful eye on all the children of the world is a very daunting task for the Cookie Monster Santa, and he needs the assistance of his little elves to create his Naughty or Nice list. So he sends his spies...narcs... elves, whatever you want to call them, into the homes of young children to be a tattle tale, kinda like the geeky hall monitor you saw on every after school special but never knew in real life. Because, you know, we teach our children not to tattle, but it's totally okay for elves.

The magic of these elves, or little people as I'm sure they'd prefer to be called, is that they mysteriously move to a new location each night. That's right, people. These are no ordinary dolls. The little guys bring the joy of Easter egg hunts to Christmas with a morning ritual of Find the Elf. Sometimes, he might even be carrying a note from Santa himself, a behavior report card of sorts for any naughty children who need redirection.

I've heard tales from my mommy friends of children who have literally cried at the first annual appearance of their Elf on the Shelf, knowing full well that their behavior is being monitored day and night.

Any toy that produces that kind of terror in the mind of a young child is welcome in my home! I mean, there's obviously nothing at all creepy about a doll that watches you all day and turns to life while you sleep, right?

1 comment:

  1. I will not feel bad about "lying" about Santa either. We need to give kids something innocent and wonderful to believe in!