March 5, 2015

SOL 5: Driver's License Lies

The last time I went to the DMV to renew my license, the lady behind the counter asked me to confirm all the data. I informed her of my change of address and handed her the proper paperwork.

Everything else is the same though?

I smiled and nodded my head.

In reality, though, the weight stated on my license has been wrong since I filled out that paperwork during driver's ed.

I don't think I've weighed that amount since junior high.


I know that sounds like an exaggeration, but I assure you it is not.

Like... that number is (sadly) not even a goal weight for me these days because it's so far-fetched.

But what was the DMV lady going to do about it?

Nothing, I hoped.

I mean... doesn't the DMV know it's incredibly RUDE to ask a woman about her weight?!

I might have recently delivered a baby. (I haven't.)

Maybe I look "fluffy" like this because I'm on steroids or some other medicine. (I'm not.)

I'm not sure if she read the plea in my eyes or if this was some sort of don't-ask-don't-tell girl code, but that lovely woman (yes, I did just say that about a government employee) just went right about her business without batting an eye.

Now, let's just hope I don't get pulled over because I may be accused of identify theft if I have to show my ID!


  1. Ha! I can so identify! They made me change my picture when I turned 30. Apparently there was a noticeable enough difference between then and what I looked like at 21 when the picture was taken!

  2. You gave me a great laugh! I love the sarcasm that goes on in your head. My mind is like a fountain of Seinfeld like questions as well. Can't wait to read more.

  3. This is exactly my experience! I've had only one bad experience with trying to slide my "lack of accurate update" by. I had one lady say, "Okay, whatever." when she asked if the weight was the same. Let's just say that I found a different location to go to after that. Thanks for the laugh!

  4. I"m so glad you're doing this SOL challenge because you are a beautifully hilarious writer! I was laughing this whole post, and I'm so glad she followed girl code!!!

  5. Hilarious. I bet she didn't question it because she probably sees it all the time, trying to prompt people once or twice but knowing she cannot call people out on their outdated weights. I have added on to mine over the years, but I am pretty sure it is still low. When I had to renew the last time (and actually get a picture), I was about 8 months pregnant with a puffy face. I laughed with my husband as I compared my old and new license. I joked about how I was going to have to deal with the new picture for years and years.

  6. HA! I just filled out the paperwork to renew my driver's license. The weight on there has always been about 90 lbs. off, but oh well. It was never correct anyways. ; ) I changed it to only 40 lbs. off now, but I'm rethinking it. I really don't want that darn license to have that number on it for the next 10 years. Yikes!
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